You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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