yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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