stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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