I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
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I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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