Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
