part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
