You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
