The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
