i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Randomize