you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
