I'm gonna have a badass scar
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
