Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize