I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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