Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
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Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
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