just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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