are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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