I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
