Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
