So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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