Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
