Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
