Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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