is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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