That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Randomize