In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
