ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
