I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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