Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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