Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize