I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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