I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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