Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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