shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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