Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Drunk is a universal language darling
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