Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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