At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Randomize
