I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
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