i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
