You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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