You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
