I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Randomize
