she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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