Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize