What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
