Betty ford says i'm here all night
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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