I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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