I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
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