Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
