Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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