im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
