for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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