SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
